musings light yagami x reader
by eternityproposal
Summary: 751 words light yagami wonders why he's so fascinated over a girl in his class. teen rating for language (and to be safe, considering death notes dark themes.)


the slow tip-tap of his pencil against a wooden desk droned in the back of his mind. he could feel burning eyes of a familiar friend against his skull. ryuk had taken to drowning out light's recent mindful escapades- full of annoying taps or hums- with the tv.

he couldn't have it on right now. no, not with cameras in nooks and corners of his room. his hazelnut eyes focused on the desk as his head remained on topic; the mind-numbing thought that buried itself into every crevice of his thoughts… how the hell was that girl so captivating? she wasn't even interesting. god, he'd say she was average under any other circumstances. short brown curly hair. dark eyes, nearly black with all that pigment. spent way too much time priming her average, blunt-cut bangs.

she was barely even pretty. more just the average "cute".

so, why he found her coming to his mind constantly was an enigma. then again, she had a strange memorable tinge to her. she was an airhead, her things frequently scattering from her knocking them aside with a move of her wrist at just the wrong time. the thoughts were irritating. he had so much more to focus on than her. his thoughts of her god damned smile were driving him up the wall. you'd think the god of a new world would have some class, but no, he was fawning over someone lesser than him.

maybe that was what he found cute about her. she was kind of pathetic, really. no noticeable talents, nothing to really write home about. but damn did she have a smile. he remembered how she never smiled with her mouth open. maybe she had bad teeth or something? self-confidence issues? the latter could do him some good. after all, if a girl was sensitive and clung to you, you could get her to believe anything. at the same time, that thought felt almost odd.

he had no problem doing that to her. but what if she believed it sincerely? no pushing or nudging, no flat-out statements of being a future deity. a legitimate follower he'd want. the thought almost made him laugh. thinking about her made him immediately think "she's pathetic, lower than dirt"— so why the actual hell was he so interested?

maybe she was better since she was the opposite of some of the girls he knew. he liked them when they were more obedient, but willing to stand up for what they were obedient to. a bit contradictory, he supposed. maybe gullible was a better word. stupid worked just as well, though he was never fond of girls who weren't at least average intelligence. being the ~wonderful deity~ he was, he didn't like talking to brick walls.

or would that just be considered preaching, in his case? hmm.

so maybe it was that all-around average angle that drew him to her. not stupid, but not bright either. not attractive, not ugly. not useful, not useless. she did have a gullible air to her as well. he knew the only problem in this scenario: she was incredibly distrusting. she almost seemed to fear others, avoiding socialization like the plague. a popular a+ student suddenly showing interest in her would be strange. not to mention, he wasn't exactly sure what to do if she turned him down.

he hadn't thought about that before. he just figured she wouldn't. what reason did she have to turn him down? probably personal ones. like, what if she wasn't interested in guys? what if she didn't want a relationship at the moment? the thought made him uncertain. he couldn't just kill her if she turned him down, but at the same time, what if she got in a relationship with someone else? would he actually be okay with seeing that?

… definitely not. he wouldn't take that standing up, that's for sure. okay, so no killing her, but she'd have to die if she said no. he could probably figure out blackmail? or maybe a bit of convincing. a simple "i am kira" wouldn't really do it here. plus, he didn't exactly want her to fear him. maybe unhealthy adoration was more his speed. after all, that's what he was feeling for her at this rate.

then again, he remembered one thing that would play in his favor. he overheard her mention tutoring at some point in math. apparently she struggled with it. getting to know her better over it would probably help.


End file.
